It just is.

So much lately have I wanted something stable. Something or someone I can depend on to always be there. Then I realize that I need to stop this childish fantasy because that is never going to happen. You can have friends, family, and lovers but at the end of the day, you are the only one looking out for yourself. I hate that in this day and age people just have cellphones or Facebook so they don't think it matters to have to see someone face to face. Well those are not enough, nor are they human. So I have deleted my Facebook and I will no longer have my cell phone next to me. I am done with going out of my way to work at relationships so hard and not have the same in return. What's the point when all you do is love and give so much energy to something or someone and it isn't returned? When you don't feel very important? I say fuck it. You want me, come to me. I will no longer voice what I want or how I feel to anyone but myself and God. She is the only one who listens anyway.